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Yes from Omnipresence
Do you need a break? From what? Being everywhere simultaneously and being spread infinitely throughout the universe is very tiring. Instantly becoming aware of all things everywhere kinda takes the surprise out of things and it’s impossible not to see it coming.
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US Military service conclusions
The best earthly decision I’ve yet made was to join the United States Air Force. The best people I have ever been around daily for extended periods of time have worn this uniform. Due to mental health issues it ended up costing me my family or maybe it just forced their lack of loyalty to…
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Head butting a Ford traveling at 40 mph
What’s the thing you’re most scared to do? What would it take to get you to do it? I’m going to guess a hard push. Maybe being bounced off a hood of another vehicle would encourage me.
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Oh that’s easy
What do you complain about the most? It’s my lack of full spectrum dominance of your headspace. I, along with many government agencies have been beaming signals into your heads for 40 plus years. Well 247 years if you count the government’s previous use of witches. My CIA handlers would like to extend a heart…
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Senator Warren
Senator Warren stole from native Americans! She should be forced to start a Native American college fund! PERIOD! Generally hookers perform a function but not Warren. However she does suck. Question 🤔 Should failed prostitutes like Warren or America’s “Thunder Cunt” be allowed to speak in public? Every fucking word from her is hate speech…
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Adolf Hitmaker
Or Adolf On Ice is in no way a cyberpunk themed tea party. One might even go as far as to say it’s about another dude Named Adolf that totally ruined that name for all time explained through dance, on ice, in a burning building. Imagine this, the first scene a guy with a dumb…
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Multi spectrum dominance of the battle space
Is simply dominating sea, land, air, cyberspace, the ethereal space vampire layer and space itself. I think adding a vampire llama layer and cheese would greatly complicate things however. 🤷♂️🤔Thanks for the suggestions though Tim! Back to today’s top stories! Wait. Oh yeah multiverse dominance of the battle spaces
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I’m awesome from 30,000 ft
I’ve decided to think about donating 11 bikes to a Nigerian prince who needs money. If I do follow through I think I’ll drop them without parachutes from a C-17 at 30,000 feet over his palace.
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From 1957 until 1964 I accidentally ran several Central American countries
I think my not yet being born gave the people there a sense of extreme hope which as lead them to exist still today. For more information you should subscribe or possibly try a Vulcan mind meld with a congressman or a random fruit at a local store? Although horrible this is a joke. Except…
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Potential Bath party turn around
I think if an Iraqi oligarch would buy the Captain Crunch brand cereal and rename it Saddam Crunch. Which naturally would be sold exclusively in Iran. It could start a chain reaction. This good will gesture towards no one would sow hatred and confusion. This rekindled enemy, Iran would possibly help people rally around a…
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Dr Strangelove 